Care for caregivers

A new caregiver support group — open to those who care for persons with any diagnosis or impairment — has started at St. Andrew's United Methodist Church. "We're hosting, but the caregivers are leading. What they want is what we'll do," said the Rev. Cathy Davis, associate pastor of pastoral care who is the facilitator. "What kind of program they want and then the sharing, it's up to them. What do you need today? What do you need to talk about?" Davis said she had been thinking about starting this kind of a group even before the church partnered with the Alzheimer's Association to present a dementia seminar in November. "Just within our church, we have so many people that are caregivers. And, I thought, as I would be visiting them, these caregivers need someplace to just come and share. They need to realize that they're not alone in this; that there are others out there. And maybe there's somebody who can give them an idea that might help," she said. So when the church started talking about hosting the Alzheimer's disease and dementia seminar, Davis thought it was the perfect time to start the group. Although she had a funeral the day of the first meeting, Davis said she was blessed that some of the women at the church offered to lead it for her. She said one of the first things she wanted to know was what attendees hoped to get out of the monthly sessions. One of the things they asked for was a 15-20 minute program every meeting to answer questions. "They wanted to know about hospice so we're having someone from hospice come in," Davis said. The next meeting will be held from 2-3:30 p.m. Jan. 4 at the church, 120 W. Sandusky St., using the West Crawford Street entrance. The speaker will be Christy Montgomery from Bridge Hospice who will discuss end-of-life care. Afterwards, members will break up into small groups to share. "We may have somebody come in and talk about caregiving or about different agencies that are out there that could help," Davis said. She said her own family cared for her father when he was diagnosed with cancer. "We were shocked at how many agencies were out there that could help you with different things," she said. Caregivers can go through a range of emotions, she added. Sometimes a caregiver can get angry with the patient because they aren't able to go out and do the things that they want. "But then you don't want to be anyplace else but with your loved one. So to have people say, 'I have those feelings, too,' means a lot," Davis said. "It makes a difference to find someone else who is going through the same thing and understands." Even if the group helps just one person, it will be worth it, said Davis, who attended a support group after her husband died. "It was just wonderful to know there was somebody out there who felt the same way I did," she explained. "OK, I'm not going crazy. I can't remember anything. Oh, you can't remember anything? OK, that's part of grief." The new group will meet year-round. And if someone wants to listen or just attend the program, they're welcome to, she said. She hopes the group will be successful because it's something that's definitely needed. "I think if they would come just one time, even if they're kind of on the fence, they would see that, oh wow, this is uplifting. I've learned something here today. Maybe I could try this with my loved one," said Davis. "We'll see where this goes but I feel like God is in the center of it. So he's going to take it in the direction he wants it, and we're saying, 'we're along for the ride.'" Registration is not required. Call Davis at 419- 422-4845 for more information.