Moving on from close friendship

Dear Annie: I felt something was wrong with my closest friend for a while. She was my maid of honor but didn't have a shower for me. She also showed up at the wedding venue fully dressed and made up, when we were supposed to get ready together.Weeks later, I said it was hurtful that no one had a shower for me. I asked her how she would feel if everyone ignored her upcoming 50th birthday, and she said she wanted to forget she was turning 50. But on the day, she had a party at a restaurant, posting pictures on Facebook and declaring her "BFF" threw the party.Cut to that summer. When her daughter (whom I've known since she was 7) got married, she asked my husband and me if we would video the wedding, and we readily agreed. Weeks went by, and we heard nothing. Then she posted the wedding photos on Facebook.I was hurt and surprised. I expressed this and she said her daughter found a college friend to do it for free. I told her I was thinking that this was our gift to her daughter, as no one ever mentioned payment nor did we expect one. I also said I was hurt that we were disinvited and she said, "You weren't disinvited because you were never invited."I can't remember the last time we saw each other, although she lives 15 minutes away. She texts me about once or twice a month.I want to say something, but it feels like a waste of time.Should I just stop responding to texts entirely or tell her she's off the hook and doesn't have to keep up this pretense? Hurt and Unsure Dear Hurt: Of course you're hurt; a friend who once meant a lot to you is now distancing herself without so much as an explanation. If you hope to get closure, send her a message explaining you've noticed the changes in your relationship and it seems that she no longer values having you in her closest circle. But if that feels like more effort than it's worth, taking a step back and allowing the friendship to naturally fade is a perfectly healthy option. Dear Annie: My wife recently received a dinner invitation from her former brother-in-law to "talk about the old days." She is planning on going. I have seen them together a couple of times at weddings/parties, and it's obvious he has feelings for her. When I had told her in the past what I'd observed, she confirmed it by saying "she already knew that because he had sent her some romantic messages."I'm not a jealous guy. I trust my wife. But I believe it's improper for her to go because it potentially is leading him on. What do you think? Dinner Invitation Dear Dinner Invitation: What's improper about her going is that she is a married woman and she knows this man is interested in her. Either attend the dinner with her, or ask her to decline the invite. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com