Readers sound off on wedding fees

Dear Readers: We've received hundreds of letters concerning weddings where the bride and groom want to charge people to attend. Apparently, this is now a trend in America where the happy couple want to have the wedding of their dreams but can't afford a lavish celebration. The reaction from the public was more than I had expected, but below are a few of the responses we received. Heloise Dear Heloise: I read your letter this morning about couples who want to charge their guests to attend. No way, no how! It's totally presumptuous and tremendously rude. If a lavish wedding is what they want, they should start saving for it as young as they can. Mary,in The Villages, Florida Dear Heloise: I hate lavish weddings. They're usually too loud, too crowded and too expensive. Asking people to pay to see this kind of spectacle is stressful for family and friends, especially if money is tight as it is for most people these days. Sarah M.,in Lansing, Michigan Dear Heloise: I think asking people to pay to attend a wedding is ridiculous! What happened to the parents of the bride paying for the wedding and the groom's family paying for the dinner that includes the bridesmaids and groomsmen the night before the wedding?However, when you are the grandma, I am sure that you want to go. So, pay for the wedding, but don't give them a gift. Your paid presence is enough of a gift. Grandma,in The Villages, Florida Dear Heloise: My oldest sister tried this pay-to-attend approach with her wedding, and no one responded. Not even our two grandmothers who love us. They found her request for "donations of $250" to be tacky and tasteless. My sister got married at city hall and was divorced 15 months later! Carolyn B.,in Yorktown, New York Dear Heloise: Well, the holidays are here, and my family is screaming for your fudge! Sadly, I've lost the recipe for your Chocolate Philly Fudge that was so popular at Christmas last year. I had to keep making a new batch each week. I took it to parties, and it would be gone in minutes. I even made double and triple amounts, and it disappeared faster than Santa up the chimney! Please reprint your recipe for this yummy treat.By the way, I love your column and have many of your books! Debra M.,in Hollywood, Florida Debra, yes, it's a favorite of mine, and I'm happy to know that you like it as well. Here is the recipe for Chocolate Philly Fudge:4 cups sifted powdered sugar1 package (8 ounces) cream cheese, softened4 ounces unsweetened chocolate, melted½ cup chopped walnuts or pecans1 teaspoon vanillaDash of saltAdd the sugar into the cream cheese gradually. The cream cheese should be soft and at room temperature. Mix the warm chocolate thoroughly into the cream cheese and sugar mixture. Stir in nuts, vanilla and salt.Spread into an 8-inch, square greased pan and chill for at least 3 hours or more before cutting into bite-sized pieces. This recipe should produce about 1.75 pounds of fudge. Heloise