HAZELWOOD: Frazee left a lasting impact

Of late, some unexpected deaths have rocked our town's equilibrium. The sudden demise of St. Paul girls basketball coach Steve Frazee on March 11 has only added to the difficulty of accepting a startling new reality. While setting up the team's banquet to celebrate the season, Frazee suffered a sudden, catastrophic medical event and was transported by helicopter to Cleveland Metro, where he died a few hours later at age 54. Before taking over the girls team for the past two seasons, he had coached in the Flyers' boys basketball program for many years. He was also active at St. Paul Catholic Church. Whether you were at the gym or in church, Steve Frazee was there with you. The utter raw emotion of losing this pillar of the community was painfully on display Monday at Frazee's celebration of life. The realization that his son, Korey, 19, and daughter, Kennedie, 17, have now lost their father just six years after the death of their mother, Stephanie, in 2020, shakes anyone to the core. At his funeral, the shock of the situation and the inability to have had an opportunity to say goodbye were palpable. An overflow crowd filled the East Main Street sanctuary as more than a half-dozen priests and deacons, both past and present, officiated the somber event. To know Steve Frazee was to be in the presence of composure rather than a whirlwind. Like any coach, he could get emotional in the tough spots that come with any sport — but he never got too high or too low. In his third year as a varsity boys assistant coach with Steve Minor, I can still envision the night Frazee showed rare emotion from the bench. As I filmed Evan Wangler scoring just before the buzzer for a stunning victory over 18-0 Crestview in February 2024, Frazee and Minor embraced to celebrate the happy moment. Minor alerted me last week to Frazee's condition and continued to provide updates in the hours afterward. And fittingly coincidentally, both of us had that celebratory moment on our minds. "Steve was always the calming presence," Minor said. "Once that ball went in and it was confirmed by the officials that the game was over, I turned around and there he was. We lost to Crestview by 37 points just one month before that night. "He was the first person I looked to because he meant so much to our team winning the conference. There were so many things he did that had an impact on me that he never even knew." Frazee shifted to coaching the Lady Flyers prior to the 2024-25 season. While still coaching the game, he was also able to spend more time at Korey's basketball games and Kennedie's swim meets. No one knew about that better than longtime St. Paul athletic director John Livengood, who helped Frazee navigate such a busy winter schedule. He also spoke about how much having Frazee as the altar server meant to him when his mother, Jean Fisher, died in February 2025. But Livengood also can't help but think of the last conversation he had with Frazee on the day before he died. "We were finalizing all the details of the upcoming banquet," he said. "As it usually did, our conversation eventually steered towards family. He shared with me how he had gone prom-dress shopping with Kennedie that past weekend and how much he enjoyed that moment with her. "That's how Steve was. His focus was his kids, and his focus was serving others. He was always giving of himself." In his first season as St. Paul's girls coach, the Flyers' recent struggles continued with just two wins against 21 losses. For this past winter, the team improved to 11 wins and 13 losses — punctuated by a comeback win over SBC River Division Old Fort to claim the sectional championship, 41-38. Under Frazee's direction, players learned to make smarter decisions and to make their free throws count, with both helping to seal that win. Over his two seasons with the SPHS girls, I interviewed Frazee more than a dozen times. Those talks not only included some tough losses, but also some wins that I sensed he felt his team wasn't yet where he wanted them to be. But that wasn't the case on Feb. 21 when he stood back and watched his players cut down the net. Frazee wasn't just saying the 'right things' because the recorder was on. Talking for an additional 15 minutes and into the gym lights being turned off, he knew how far his team had come in one season. When assistant coach Emily Grine thinks of those positive moments, she goes back to a 94-foot walk. Frazee began a tradition with players and coaches walking the length of the court (94 feet, baseline to baseline), discussing a question or topic. "It ranged from favorite ice cream flavor to what our goals for the season were," Grine recalled. "It was just a fun way to break up practice during the week. The best part was when he would yell, 'baseline!' before we did these walks. I think even the rest of us coaches still jumped a little when hearing that word." And, no matter what kind of day Frazee was having, the girls could always bring a smile to his face, she noted. "Whether it was a joke, accidentally shooting the ball over the backboard in a drill, or having them guess what '80s or '90s band sang what song, we were always laughing." Last year, interviewing for a feature story, I learned how Frazee was viewed at home by his kids. For months, I watched the same brief interaction. Win or lose, after every game, Korey found his dad for a quick handshake, hug, or just a pat on the back. This went on throughout the entire 2024-25 season for the Flyers' boys team. As St. Paul went on to win Firelands Conference and sectional championship games, I observed father and son have even more heartfelt, longer embraces. Kennedie also joined in for those after-game moments. Knowing the topic wasn't easy, I lightly asked Korey about his late mother after St. Paul added a district championship to its banner season. Stephanie was just 42 when she died from a long fight with breast cancer in September 2020. With the recorder running, I'll never forget what happened next. The young man briefly hesitated and took a deep breath. He then went on to heap praise on his dad for more than a minute straight without stopping: "He's my everything," Korey said. "What happened with my mom was tough. But Dad is my No. 1 supporter. He's my role model, best friend, and coach on the floor and in life. "He's just a special guy who is always there for me. In sports, we always talk about stepping up and being a leader, and that's what he did in our household. There were a lot of questions [after Stephanie's death], but I love that man to death and would do anything for him." Reading those words now is certainly difficult, but also speaks volumes about who Steve Frazee was to his children and to everyone who knew him. Thinking back fondly to many interactions with him, I can't help recalling our mutual friendship with the late Steve Gray. He too died suddenly, on Dec. 27, and was well-known here as the successful and longtime boys basketball coach at Norwalk High School. In retirement, Gray was the color analyst for many local games broadcast by WLKR-FM. At the St. Paul gym, Gray would often barge into the locker room and, making sure Frazee was within earshot, would joke that Korey must be getting 'bad advice from home' and instead should listen to his other coaches. All in good fun, of course — because Steve Frazee's first coach as a freshman at Buckeye Central was none other than Steve Gray. His wife, Sue, also on staff, taught Stephanie as a BC student. Both couples and their families moved to Norwalk. I still see Frazee carrying the cross as an altar server for Gray's funeral on Jan. 5; the two of us talked about his role in the days and weeks afterward. Frazee's emotions were plain to see as he led the Gray family up the aisle when the funeral Mass ended. To think that these two men — who had an impact on so many athletes and in our larger community as well — would both suddenly pass away within three months' time is definitely difficult to fathom and accept. Frazee was helping a girls basketball team to early success. He helped people daily in some way at church, where he could be found five days a week at 6:15 a.m. Mass. He was a proud dad who found joy in his children's accomplishments. Frazee made known that he was thrilled to see Korey help coach junior-high basketball at St. Paul while taking college courses. I was among many with whom he shared photos of Kennedie's record-breaking swim races with her teammates. In the days since his death, one story stands above the rest for me. Julee Gross is another well-known person around Norwalk. She can be found walking throughout the city, creating works at Artists Open Studio on East Main Street, and in the stands at sporting events for the Flyers and Truckers. Julee is a big fan of Flyers' basketball. When team apparel was ordered for this past season, Frazee bought an extra sweatshirt and then delivered it to her. "Steve was a very inclusive person, and when he took over, he always made a point to ensure the girls knew to honor, recognize, and celebrate with Julee whenever they could," assistant coach Emily Riley said. Before Frazee was loaded into the ambulance prior to the team banquet, he gave instructions to Riley for the event. His final directive was highly specific, she noted. "The last thing he said to me was, 'Julee wants to say something tonight,'" Riley recalled. Even in his crisis moment, Frazee wanted to make sure his team's biggest supporter got her chance to talk. To me, that speaks entirely to the kind of man, father, coach and mentor Steve Frazee embodied. "And she did," Riley said. "[Julee] got up in front of everyone there, congratulated the girls on their season, and told them how proud she was of them. Just like he wanted."